Emmett Potter and the DimWitted Wizard Twits
by Twilight Fan Girls
Summary: The Cullens are all enrolled into Hogwarts as Emmett is dared to prove to the Wizarding World that HE is the real Harry Potter...but how is he going to do that with his whole 6'5' self?


Well guys, I promised you another story and I stayed true to that promise

_Well guys, I promised you another story and I stayed true to that promise! Here it is, the much anticipated first chapter of Emmett's dare. For those of you new readers, this is basically a branch off of my other story, "The Cullens plus Amusement Park equals DISASTER!" Yes, this is Harry here, and I've figured out what I'm doing after like, 12 years. But before I get to the chapter, I have an incredibly coincidental story to relay to you readers…_

**So remember how I said I was going to Wonderland with my friend Voldemort? Yes, well we went with another friend (we'll call her Wormtail), and we went on this ride called The Rage. So we all noticed the ride operator, but Voldy pointed him out. "Hey, doesn't he look like the kid playing Jacob in Twilight, Taylor Lautner?!" I WAS THINKING THAT TOO! So we check him out in every sense, and he looked like an older, more mature and much hotter version of Taylor Lautner. We went on that ride again SIX TIMES and we wanted to know his name. Wormtail found out it started with T, so we assumed it was Timothy (I don't know where that came from). Then Voldy and I took a closer look, and his name was … TAYLOR! Yeah, scariest thing ever. Oo He was really hot though. I LOVE YOU TAYLOR! :D**

_Now, to the story! Warning: This story is OOC. It is a PARODY, and a crossover of Harry Potter AND Twilight, two of my three loves. If you don't like any of the above, you might not want to read this. This is kind of pre-Dumbledore's death and Snape's betrayal yet they're all 17. Feel free to leave feedback! It may seem a little slow at first, but I have to establish the story, ya dig? ENJOY!_

**Emmett's Makeover**

**Emmett POV**

Oh man. Never in my overly-long life have I ever been frightened before. I know what you're thinking (that's right, I'm pulling an Edward here); "Emmett? FRIGHTENED?! That's just about as possible as Carlisle making out with Aro!" But, as ashamed as I am to admit it, this is something that wiped that incredible dashing, chick-attracting smile right off my face. What could possible have made me tremble so hard that the floor was rattling?

_WHOOSH._

I snapped around, crouched and ready to attack. My breathing picked up and I felt incredible vulnerable.

_BANG!_

In my haste to move forward, I stumbled and fell over my own two feet…like BELLA. (SHAME!) I snarled and hastened to get off the floor, but it was too late.

"Gotcha," a sweet voice whispered by my ear, as my own personal Angel-From-Hell flew through the air and landed on my back.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

**Bella POV**

I don't think I've ever laughed so hard. Yes, Emmett had just been attacked in his own house by his own wife/soul mate. Rosalie grinned as she dragged Emmett forward toward the stairs, keeping his hands pinned to his back as he snapped and snarled furiously. Edward stood with his hand around my waist, doubled over with laughter along with Jasper, Esme and Carlisle.

"PLEASE, WILL YOU SHOW ME NO MERCY?!" Edward bellowed dramatically, causing Rosalie to roll her eyes as they trundled forward.

"Brother, do you think WE were spared? No, it's only fair that you go through the same thing," Jasper teased, a truly maniacal grin on his face. The atmosphere was charged with excitement and vengeance.

That's right: It was Emmett's dare day. Let me rewind a little bit…Edward, Jasper and Emmett lost a bet while we were at "Adventure Land", the amusement park from hell. They lost to Alice, Rosalie and I. The consequences? Embarrassing and excruciating dares. Jasper and Edward had already done theirs, having to act Emo and Gangster, which led to gang violence, creep stalkers and a Disney Channel Dance-Off. But, Emmett still had to do his. What is this dare, you may ask?

Alice emerged at the top of the stairs, brandishing mascara and an eyelash curler. "Are you ready for your make-over, EMMETT POTTER?"

**Alice POV**

After minutes of struggling and pushes, heaves and vampiric behaviour from Rose and I, we had finally managed to pull Emmett into my room. He was now seated in front of my mirror, surrounded by Chanel, Dior and Clinique make-up, along with a wardrobe fit for any and all Wizarding Heroes. That's right, Emmett was being transformed into none other than Harry Potter, the savior of all Wizards. Now it was his responsibility to prove that he was, indeed, the real Harry Potter. Well…good luck with that, 6'5" muscular, curly haired kid.

Bella was on the toilet lid, watching with amusement. I took a deep breath. "Rose? Hand me the eyeliner." Emmett bellowed in rage as I applied a very light coat of eyeliner to Emmett's eyes. "We're going to need this to bring out your green eyes!"

"I…don't…have…green…eyes!" Emmett muttered through his gritted teeth.

"Yes, well, that'll change," Rosalie said. Then she squealed, "DIBS ON HIS HAIR!!" She pulled out my hair straightener and began pulling at his curls, running the straightener through.

_** 4 HOURS LATER **_

Rosalie's hair was all over the place. I was breathing too fast. Even Bella was sweating, just watching.

"DONE!" We all squealed at the same time, slapping high-fives.

"Emmett, you might as well cooperate now and get your butt down the stairs!" Edward called.

**Edward POV**

"Vampires alike, "Alice's voice called from upstairs as everyone scuttled to the foot of the stairs. "After hours of blood, swear and tears (LAME), we present…HARRY POTTER!" Alice, Rosalie and Bella showed up with…Harry Potter? The resemblance was uncanny. Spiky black, gel filled hair, round glasses, a lightning bolt scar. Even the scowl looked perfect. The girls pulled Emmett down the stairs, where he almost stumbled over his long, black robes.

Esme clapped her hands in delight. "I must say girls, you've done an _amazing _job."

"Yes, yes, that's all fine but…we need to sort out the details so you kids don't accidentally expose us," Carlisle said, gesturing to the couches.

**Jasper POV**

I stole another glance at Emmett. He caught me this time and let out a snarl. I grinned so wide my cheeks hurt.

"Well, I have everything settled. I've enrolled us all for a week at Hogwarts, the Wizard school. All except Esme, Carlisle and…Bella," Alice said, throwing an apologetic glance at Bella. She stood up angrily in protest.

"This is so unfair! Why aren't I going?!" Bella yelled.

"Don't take it personally Bella, but…Muggles, a.k.a. non-magical humans can't see Hogwarts," I muttered, looking down.

"AUGH, how TYPICAL!" She screeched, storming out of the house. Edward jumped up.

"If she's not going, count me out," he said, gliding away. Alice shook her heard.

"Anyway, Jasper; you, Emmett and I are students. And you, Rose, are the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher!" Rosalie grinned.

"Excellent, now I just have to figure out what that means."

"Hold on; none of you can do magic…how is this going to work?" Carlisle asked, his brows coming together.

"No worries, C, we got connectionz, yao!" Alice said. Everyone gave her a blank look. "Sorry, You'll see what I mean later. Go pack your trunks everyone, the train is leaving tomorrow! Oh, Emmett," Alice added as he tried to get up with Rose and I. "Yours is already carefully packed, so take a seat."

**Esme POV**

"A couple of things. Your best friends are named Ron and Hermione, you hate a dude named Malfoy and you idolize Dumbledore. Remember all that and you're good. Next, you're big on flying. Not with wings, but with, er…brooms," Alice said, looking at me. I frowned.

"I haven't got a broom bit…I have a mop! Think about it, mops clean better than brooms, they must fly better too!"

"Great thinking!" Alice squealed. "Finally, you have a pet owl." Emmett's eyes bugged out.

"You think I can keep my LUNCH as a PET?!" Emmett said incredulously.

"You're right, that won't work...wait! I have an idea!" Alice sprang up, pulling out her phone and dialing a number. "Hello? Aro!"

**Alice POV**

"Alice, dearest! It's been too long," Aro gushed.

"Aro, I have a favor to ask for. Could Emmett borrow Coco for a week?" I bit my lip, waiting. Coco was Aro's beloved pet lizard that he pampered like no tomorrow. I hastened to explain the sitch to Aro.

"I…my…but…Coco! How can I leave him without mommy for a _WEEK?!_" Aro gasped.

"Emmett will take full care of him Aro, and I'll make it up to you. We can have another sleepover once this is over!"

Aro squealed. "Oh goody! Alright, I'll send over Coco on his private jet with Jane right now. Goodbye, Alice darling! Coco baby!" Aro cooed before hanging up.

Carlisle walked over to me. "Alice…what about the actual Harry Potter? What are you going to do with him?"

"Well…I was hoping we could bring him here and Bella and Edward could take care of him."


End file.
